TOO MUCH KISSING

WOLFPACK OF ONE SINGLES CLUB: ELEVEN
It's nothing a bit of cream won't sort out.

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Hey Andrew, I'm afraid I've got some bad news for you. This isn't going to kill you, but you might have some explaining to do. Like who was that girl on the night that you met? And how did this turn blue if you didn't have sex? And what do you suggest that the two of you try and do next.

This is going to hurt a little bit, you're going to feel a little prick. The message is clear: There's been to musch kissing around here.

Every letter that you get for the next two weeks might be from me. You can keep it like a secret, but I suggest you read the leaflet, baby.

You'd better call your back catalogue, you've given them more than a song. The lesson is clear, there's been too much kissing around here.

THE DISTANCE RUNS CROSS COUNTRY

WOLFPACK OF ONE SINGLES CLUB: TEN
People who liked 'The Distance' also liked: Tainted Love, Wonderwall and jogging.

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The distance runs: cross country and marathons, from London to Birmingham and too many times I couldn't make up.

I used to run to you (I'd run). I'd wear out training shoes for fun. We've both done a couple of laps since then, but I'll catch up with you again.

The distance runs over obstacles and jumps, back to 1991, past both our little accidents.

THE FONZ

WOLFPACK OF ONE SINGLES CLUB: NINE
This day is ours, won't you be mine (Oh happy days)

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Well. You must be The Fonz or somebody. You walk through the door and I want to applaud. Your repeats remind me my heart's beating, I laugh at your jokes though I've heard them all before.

Now, I hate to sound like Sting, but everything you do is magic. A smile from you could set fire to the room. And now you're not here, there's no atmosphere and I'm freezing. It feels just like I'm walking on the moon.

Is it too late to say I'm sorry and I miss you? Is it too lame to say I worry and I care? Because the truth is that I'm useless with you not here. I'm beaten like this drum and, Fonzie, I'm scared.

THE MONEY WON'T CHANGE ME (BUT THE FULL MOON MIGHT)

WOLFPACK OF ONE SINGLES CLUB: EIGHT
So this nice lady asked me to write something for magazine about 'change'. I thought long and hard about the topic. I thought about how change is essential to life, art, death and everything. I thought about how change is incredibly personal, political and powerful. And then I thought, wouldn't it be cool if a werewolf won the lottery? Sorry HW, I didn't finish my homework...

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I went up to collect the biggest cheque I've ever seen. Nine million pounds and change, it was a big rollover week. The lottery people wondered who would give the thing to me. I looked at their list and selected Girls Aloud and Ice T.

"You see I bought my scratchcard from a shop, yo Ice, I know that's a boring story. But now the scratching just won't stop, and I'm assaulting tourists." And there beneath the stagelights with Nadine from Girls Aloud my shirt it just burst open and hair started spilling out.

I've been feeling weird lately, I bought everybody quad bikes. The money won't change me, but the full moon might. I moved into a new place, with my own private driving range. I did the bedrooms out like Cribs but now I'm sleeping in a cage.

I made good my escape from the TV studio, I headed for the city centre via a pet shop that I know. Now normally my bank manager isn't all that pleased to see mebut I deposited nine million quid and half of Cheryl Tweedy.

I've been feeling weird lately, bought four cars I can't drive. The money won't change me but the full moon might. I'm developing a scent for blood and a strange taste in gold chains, you'd better get a silver bullet in case you see me start to change.

Take a look at me now: Big house, four cars and a bolt-hole in Manilla. I always wanted to lead the rock-star life, but maybe not Michael Jackson's. In Thriller.

I've been feeling weird lately, I've been chasing the neighbour's cat. The money didn't change me, but the full moon has.